★ ★ ★ T E R R I T O R Y M A R S H A L ★ ★ ★

WANTED

✦ DEAD OR ALIVE ✦

REWARD FOR CAPTURE

$ 999,999

"NEON" THE MOISTURE BANDIT
Wanted for: unauthorized SUDO, server intrusion, packet rustlin', DDoS conspiracy

SEEN AROUND: PORT 1337BY ORDER OF THE SHERIFF